I have struggled with letting go for quite some time now. Friends, relationships, and situations linger on in my mind until they become a sad obsession that slowly eats at me.
It isn’t until something else happens that it finally starts to fade for that time, until it’s quiet again and everything pours in at once.
It may be the nice weather or me focusing on myself for a change, though I feel like I’m starting to get it.
I must remember that holding something tight to me doesn’t mean it can’t get pulled away.
It’s something I have to accept.
It seems so simple until you’re in the moment, frustrated by a coworker, a friend who keeps canceling, or just having a lonely night.
It’s a conscious decision until it comes (hopefully) naturally.
I have been learning to accept my faults, let go of the bad connection towards them, and instead figure out the why.
I ask for signs.
This morning was my appointment establishing patient care at a doctor's office, and I knew I needed extra help getting through this funk, so I asked for it.
When picking up the prescription, the total ended up being $5.55. It’s a small thing, and some may even say it’s dumb, though who am I to question reality?
I was hammocking and practicing photos while listening to music.
At one point, I got up to walk around once more, had my eyes closed, and swayed (I was dancing) to the sounds.
When I opened my eyes, two deer were standing right before me. I accidentally scared them, and they backed away, which is when I got the photo.
I’ve always felt connected to deer. On my birthdays and sad days, either one comes up to me, or I watch it outside a window.
I have always felt close to them. They are one of the more popular wildlife animals, though again.
Who am I to question reality?
It’s hard to find comfort when the world seems in shambles.
I am grateful for these moments and the privilege of spending time with myself.
It isn’t until something else happens that it finally starts to fade for that time, until it’s quiet again and everything pours in at once.
It may be the nice weather or me focusing on myself for a change, though I feel like I’m starting to get it.
I must remember that holding something tight to me doesn’t mean it can’t get pulled away.
It’s something I have to accept.
It seems so simple until you’re in the moment, frustrated by a coworker, a friend who keeps canceling, or just having a lonely night.
It’s a conscious decision until it comes (hopefully) naturally.
I have been learning to accept my faults, let go of the bad connection towards them, and instead figure out the why.
I ask for signs.
This morning was my appointment establishing patient care at a doctor's office, and I knew I needed extra help getting through this funk, so I asked for it.
When picking up the prescription, the total ended up being $5.55. It’s a small thing, and some may even say it’s dumb, though who am I to question reality?
I was hammocking and practicing photos while listening to music.
At one point, I got up to walk around once more, had my eyes closed, and swayed (I was dancing) to the sounds.
When I opened my eyes, two deer were standing right before me. I accidentally scared them, and they backed away, which is when I got the photo.
I’ve always felt connected to deer. On my birthdays and sad days, either one comes up to me, or I watch it outside a window.
I have always felt close to them. They are one of the more popular wildlife animals, though again.
Who am I to question reality?
It’s hard to find comfort when the world seems in shambles.
I am grateful for these moments and the privilege of spending time with myself.
